Sayonara, 2020.
2020 has been a doozy in more ways than one. A word that could describe it: Uncertainty. While scary, times of uncertainty can also help us build resilience, gratitude and perspective, if we let them. So instead of cursing 2020, thank it for the lessons it taught and promptly send it on its way. Then use your newfound insight to create bright, fresh beginnings and to plan your goals for 2021. It’s as simple as one, two.
Courtesy of Newyorker.com
Step 1: What DID we learn?!
Before we focus on new hopes, dreams and goals moving forward, let’s take a stroll down memory lane. The following themes stand out in my mind.
Go ahead, do nothing.
While we were all stuck at home, we had a lot of time to think. We were forced to slow down. For those of us who are used to packed schedules, we may have felt unsettled. Conversely, if you enjoyed laying around at home a bit, don’t feel bad. Turns out, some down time is good for us. In our hyper activity-focused world, it’s okay to slow down and just BE. Recharging our batteries by relaxing and not feeling the need to accomplish stuff all of the time is good for our health, both mental and physical.
Ask for help.
Let’s face it, quarantine is no cake walk. Some of us may have had to ask for help—a lot. Some of us may have had to extend beyond our comfort zones and reach out family, friends, or professionals for help at some point. And you know what? That’s completely okay. In fact, it’s encouraged. One thing the pandemic made glaringly clear is that humans weren’t meant to be isolated. We’re all connected, we depend on each other, and we’re never alone, even though it may not always feel that way.
Unplug.
Being at home has caused us to cling more to technology to connect with the world, but perhaps some of us also rediscovered the simple joys in life, like nature, hanging with family, or forgotten hobbies. Much of the news this year was confusing and negative, and knowing when to step away from it all is a great skill to have. Likewise with social media, where constant comparisons, rudeness and pettiness can get to be too much. Follow your instincts when you feel like you should recenter your energy on what really matters to you in the non-virtual world.
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Count your blessings.
Many of us learned to get by with less this past year, and while it wasn’t fun, we discovered how little we really need. Without future events to stress over and fewer chances to go shopping, some of us instead focused on what we had in the present moment. We may have even decluttered and donated stuff gathering dust in our closets, which has a cleansing effect of its own. Or, we may have looked within ourselves to make our own happiness, rather than looking for it in other people and things. Being alone doesn’t have to mean being lonely.
In difficult times, tough stuff gets revealed.
Times of crisis have a way of shining a big glaring light on all of parts of ourselves, others, and our society that need TLC. Also, with fewer distractions to keep us occupied every day, we were forced to be alone with our thoughts more. How we respond to crisis can determine a lot. If we’re stressed or angry about something, a crisis can cause us to become even more stressed and angry, or it can force us to finally deal with unresolved emotions. In short, difficult times can enable you to become more resilient–IF you choose to.
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Life is a gift. Live in the moment.
It may seem sometimes like we’re invincible, but this year helped remind us that we’re all human and only live once. It’s best to focus on the things that really matter to us instead of wasting our time worrying about inconsequential stuff. Our thoughts have a lot of power over us, so why spend your precious time thinking about things that make you upset? Focus on your routines, goals, and simple things that make you happy.
Accept that sometimes, it just is what it is.
We have power to change some things in our lives, but for the stuff we have no control over, we feel better by accepting the circumstances rather than obsessing over them. Allow yourself to feel anxious instead of burying your feelings. If you happen to find yourself feeling negative and all-around crappy, don’t beat yourself up over it. Then, remember that the more flexible we are in our lives, the happier we’ll be in the long run, and that change is inevitable—Nothing stays the same forever.
Trust yourself and take care of yourself.
We’ve spent a lot of time in our own company this year. Hopefully you’ve gotten to know yourself even better. Maybe you’ve started healthier habits. Maybe you even realized you’re more capable than you thought you were. You know yourself best, so listen to your inner voice and trust yourself. You’re in control of your mind, your future, and what you do with your time.
Pick your battles wisely, with kindness in mind.
Are the consequences of arguing with others and always having the last word really worth it? Sometimes silence is the best response to something, and sometimes it’s best to speak up. Know when to pick your battles. We make better decisions when we learn to respond to situations smartly, rather than reacting based on emotion. Know when to walk away from a situation, realizing that others are fighting their own private battles.
Step 2: You’ve changed. You’ve grown. Now….plan.
Whether you want to revisit and recycle existing goals, or you have whole new ones, it’s never too late to hit the “reset” button on your life, no matter what month it is! But what better time than now? Everything you need to do this exists inside you. The key? Plan smartly, then follow through and do the required work, day by day. Here’s how.
The art of the action plan
If you resolve to make 2021 the year that you become the strong, confident, sparkling version of yourself that you envision, whether it’s dropping a few pounds, stressing out less, gaining more energy, or something different, you probably have a loose idea about how you want to achieve this. But have you really thought it through? Creating an action plan helps to break it all down to the details, putting them to work on a daily and weekly basis to achieve small habit changes. These daily tweaks quickly add up to success. Clear goals along with an action plan will help you figure out the why and how of what you hope to do—two key motivators that will help you stick it out till the end.
The action plan can apply to literally any goal you want to achieve in your life, but let me illustrate this with the example of getting physically healthier, for simplicity’s sake. Say you want to exercise more in order to fit into your clothes better. Exactly when and where will you do it? If your schedule goes awry, what’s your contingency plan? An action plan helps you iron out these pesky details and get right back on track should you fall off the wagon.
Get specific with your goals.
Get started by choosing a long-term goal. Really think about this.
Visualize yourself six months from now, having achieved this goal. What does this different “you” look like? How does this person feel? Now think about why you want to become this person. The real, deep-down why. Not the “I want to fit into my clothes” why–Think about the real ways you think this change will improve your life. Do you want increased energy and longevity? Would you love to get off your medications? Now grab a piece of paper and write this down. Be as specific as possible.
Next, with your long-term goal in mind, think of 1-3 shorter-term goals that will help you reach that larger aspiration. Maybe you would like to choose one nutrition goal and one physical activity goal. For example, you choose to decrease your sugar intake, and you also choose to exercise consistently. Write your goal(s) underneath your larger one.
Plan it out.
Here’s where the action plan comes in. How specifically will you attain your 6-week goal? Pick something to work on for one week–the upcoming week (start a new workout regimen, start a food diary, etc.).
Looking at your calendar, decide:
- What exactly you want to do. For example, if you want to exercise, will you attend a spinning class, start using weights, or a combination of both
- What days during the upcoming week you will work on this.
- How long each day (for example, 30 minutes) OR What distance (around the block) OR How much (1 portion)
- What time or time of day (for example, 7 am, morning, evening, etc.)
Remember to write all of this down!
Now, get to work.
Now that you have your plan written down and ready to go, stick to it the best you can. And if life happens to mess up your plan (which is most certainly will!), ask yourself:
- What barriers do I foresee getting in my way, and what is my backup plan? Go to this contingency plan if needed. (For example, if you expect a hectic upcoming week but want to start snacking healthier, keep a bag of almonds and an apple in your bag.) It’s okay to realize you need to change things up on the fly to better fit your life!
- How will I reward myself if I am successful this week? Maybe the feeling of accomplishment will be enough, but if you feel you’ll need extra incentive, go ahead and think of a simple, non-food reward. Maybe you’ll give yourself guilt-free permission to binge-watch a couple of episodes of your favorite TV show, or you’ll buy a new workout shirt.
Don’t quit.
If you only accomplished some of your weekly action plan–or none at all–don’t beat yourself up. The fact that you’re beginning to make efforts to positively change your life is enough, as long as you keep trying. Each week, refresh your action plan, adding new challenges and activities as needed to get you through to your 6-week goal. As the weeks add up, you’ll create new habits and build confidence in your accomplishments. And if you aren’t successful every single day, just remember this: Week by week, small changes will grow into the beginning of real transformation. Tomorrow always brings a new day and a fresh, new chance.
Finally, set yourself up for success.
Whatever you choose to accomplish each week, it should be:
–Something you really want to do. Don’t do it to get your nagging spouse off your back or only because you think you should.
–Something that is realistic to achieve within the next week. Again, baby steps! For instance, exercising for an hour every single day of the week may difficult to follow through on if you’re new to exercise.
–Something that’s a specific action. Losing weight is not a specific action, but the result of an action. Think about the “how”.
Action planning is a life-long, valuable tool to help you reach goals you create for any aspect of your life, and you can use it to purposefully plan out your weeks for as long as you want. If your goals are clear and your plan is solid, you’re well on your way to lifelong progress. May this year be yours to the absolute fullest!
Try this downloadable, printable tracking sheet.
Tracking your activities daily can help you record your success—and figure out where you need to improve and make adjustments. I’ve included my Fresh Start 6-week Exercise and Nutrition Tracking Sheet here for your use! Each day that you ate well and exercised, place a check mark in the appropriate space. You can even jot down what kind of workout you did under “exercise” to keep track of your workout schedule.
Click here to print
I hope these pointers will help you get the best start possible for a new mindset and new, exciting possibilities in 2021. I’m still learning that it’s never too late. Cheers 🙂
